Nope, not click bait!
On Tuesday the 2nd of May, my world changed. My focus shifted and I knew that things would never be the same again (cliché, but completely and irrecoverably truthful). For weeks I’d noticed my body changing, but on doing pregnancy test after pregnancy test they’d come back negative. Thinking nothing of it after that, I continued doing my HIT training, carried on using my weighted hula hoop and kept up with my contraceptive pill.
I began getting sore breasts – to the point where I couldn’t cope with any pressure on them at night. Hot flushes where my skin around my neck and face would flush bright red and become hot. Nausea like I’d never had before, and that set alarm bells ringing once again.. So I found myself sat on the toilet, staring at another set of pregnancy tests. Except these didn’t come up with a single red line – this test came up with a pair of them. I did the second in disbelief, but it came back the same. So for weeks my body had refused to tell me I was pregnant, and when it finally caved in to give me the secret I really wasn’t prepared at all!
I had a really grounding moment when I realised that I wasn’t in the room alone. I can’t explain how human I felt. Then the fear kicked in – we hadn’t planned for this, we didn’t have an easy life as it was – how could we cope with a child? I remember the moment with such clarity – Mike was out playing snooker and I was sat there feeling very small – still sat on the toilet. When he came home, I blurted out everything and we had a few days where we didn’t speak about the situation so we could both wrap our own minds around it. It worked, and we found ourselves working together to bring our lives onto parallel paths, and those roads are way out in front of us at the moment.
Now, I’m sat down finishing this post off after being with Mike in the ultrasound room with the nurse. We both stared at the screen as she showcased our little sweetheart, who is healthy and happy – and a little shy as they kept turning away from the ultrasound. We have to go back in a few weeks to have another scan, as baby is a little too small to be dated (2 millimetres short!) but in all honesty, we are simply happy to have an approximate age. After my disaster with the contraceptive implant, I’d had no periods to date the baby – just a little spotting here and there – so we didn’t have a clue. Parenthood is going to be a new challenge, but I’m so excited for our journey ahead.