Dearest little one;
I’m writing this two weeks after you came into the world. Two weeks after my life completely changed – two weeks since I first held you in my arms. In that short space of time, you’ve educated me in life lessons I never thought I’d ever have to learn – what to do when I’m in the middle of changing you and you decide to go to the toilet, what to do when you cry and I don’t know why, and what to do when you babble to yourself in your sleep at all hours of the early morning. You’ve taught me that sunrise isn’t a big deal, and sleeping in past seven in the morning was really over-rated. I’ve become well versed in nursery rhymes, and I’m far to accustomed to browsing baby clothes on Instagram while you lazily feed at hours I didn’t think existed.
My life has been turned on its head, shaken a few times and then left upside down as you came into it.
But I’m.. I’m happy with that. I truly am. Even if I’m awake when the birds are. Even if its been weeks since I straightened my hair or put makeup on. My new job role doesn’t require that kind of uniform you see – instead of putting a face on in the morning, I’m putting a nappy on. Instead of dragging a Tangleteezer through my hair I’m throwing it into a ‘Mum Bun’, no worries had that it probably hasn’t been brushed in a few days.
Every sacrifice I’ve found myself making, I don’t miss at all when I look down at you in my arms. Cliché, but the stories are inexplicably true. As soon as you hold your child in your arms, you’d walk through fire and ice to please them – even if it only causes a brief flutter of a smile for a moment. All that matters now, is that tiny little life that falls heavily under your responsibility. I realise now, how selfish and juvenile I probably was before you came along.. Frivolous with my finances, lax at keeping my blessings counted and a queen at procrastination. In my 30 years of life, I’ve never felt a more enlightening time than I have this last fortnight and I have you to thank for that.
Having a child can make or break you, they say.
Well – you make me, every single day.